As believers, we are like gymnasts walking the balance beam. Our various responsibilities can easily get the best of us and cause us to wobble. There is marriage, and even if we are not married, we have family, the assembly and work to keep in balance. Keeping everything in balance helps us gracefully move through life and avoid stumbling. In this article, we will examine the resources that help us balance obligations and the pitfalls that hinder us in handling all our responsibilities.
The Decision of Every Believer
Understanding proper balance begins with presenting our bodies as a living sacrifice (Rom 12:1). Such a decision and way of life is normal Christian behaviour and the result of a proper appreciation of God’s mercy. This commitment helps prevent us from compartmentalizing any aspect of life outside the Lordship of Christ. The first step toward a balance acceptable to God is to guard ourselves from having one foot in the world.
The Resource of Older Believers
Older believers in our assemblies hold a treasure trove of wisdom. The lessons from the experiences of an older generation are still relevant to the next. We must let them help us with our lives. When Paul writes his epistles, he sometimes specifically addresses age or people groups one after the other (e.g., Eph 5:22-6:9). The sequential addressing of age groups assumes that God’s people, regardless of designation, are all together, listening to each other’s needs and working together to help one another. If you are older, it is greatly beneficial to connect with young people, perk up when teaching is directed toward them, and learn their needs.
Further, though it is true of brothers also, older sisters should develop outstanding character so as to teach younger sisters to manage domestic affairs (Titus 2:4-5). Younger sisters: Seek the help of older sisters. Don’t rely on the internet or social media influencer hacks, but ask for advice and be willing to try it; they know more than whoever instructed you in that post. An older generation’s pressures and causes for imbalance in life were different, but they were also stressed and will bond with you on the principles of staying balanced in the present age.
The Danger of Societal Influence
The age in which we live attempts to “squeeze you into its own mould” (Rom 12:2 J.B. Phillips New Testament). Is it possible that we are out of balance because we view marriage, the assembly, family or work the way the culture does? Men are pressured to be affluent and have a great physique, an attractive woman and a perfect family. Paul provides further instructions to us to continually be “renewing our mind” by the Scriptures to keep in calibration. What is our priority?
These same pressures are magnified for women, highlighting the importance of maintaining balance for our sisters with support from the brothers. Here are a few errors society promotes to which Christians can fall prey: females should rule over their husbands; feeling underappreciated validates divorce or extra-marital affairs; climb the career ladder at the family’s expense, or don’t have kids at all; and take leadership roles in the church or among the churches. We can pretend these mindsets cannot infiltrate an assembly, but they can. We need godly men who will redirect a sister’s ambition to the sphere where she is much needed, or disaster will follow, as in the days of Judges when “every man did what was right in his own eyes” (Jdg 21:25 KJV).
Paul exalts widows for good works, bringing up children, service, hospitality and care (1Ti 5:9-10). The Proverbs 31 woman is busy and productive for the benefit of the family. Western society generally pressures women out of the role that God presents to them. Balancing proper roles of family and marriage will require faith, love and holiness with clear thinking (1Ti 2:15).
The Danger of Overcommitment
Overcommitment can throw us out of alignment. How much time should we devote to each aspect of life? There are times at the end of the day when you may wish for more hours, yet God created a 24-hour day in which we also need appropriate rest to be refreshed enough to accomplish the next day’s tasks. God’s work in the days of creation was never sluggish or in a rush, but He completed exactly what was good for the day. It is easy to overcommit at work or take overtime, but we need to seriously consider before the Lord whether this time is profitable for eternity.
Further, we need to ask ourselves whether we are committing to matters that the Lord never asked us to do, even in the assembly. Some assembly work can become busy work, as not all service is worship, and service may not be done in faith. Paul’s first words of faith were, “Lord, what do You want me to do?” which became a pattern for the rest of his life (Act 9:6 NKJV). Paul was concerned about what the Lord desired, then busily obeyed without getting caught up in what he wanted. If necessary, redirect your activities with your assembly to match the gifts and pursuits the Lord has for you.
The Danger of Materialism
The pursuit of wealth and comfort can easily overtake us. James warns us that believers become worldly by pursuing material goods and power (Jas 4:1-4). Likewise, Paul warns Timothy of false teachers who suppose “gain is godliness,” while “the love of money is the root of all evil” (1Ti 6:5,10 KJV). As believers, we responsibly provide for our families, yet the goal of material wealth, even with good intentions, can cause us to drop responsibilities in the assembly or neglect our families. Ironically, providing for our family beyond what we should can actually rob our families and marriages and deplete our assembly.
The Danger of Distractions
We once lived in the information age; we now live in the distraction age. Everyone and everything clamour for our attention. Social media algorithms target every trackable movement. Genitive AI produces customized distractions to please your every fleshly desire. We lose balance when we lose minutes staring at a screen in our hands, mindlessly scrolling, playing games and swiping. Paul challenged Timothy not to be entangled with “the affairs of this life” (2Ti 2:4 KJV). We could all pause and question whether we are redeeming the time or whether work or something else is contributing to an unbalanced life, and then seek the appropriate solution (Eph 5:16).
